Sunday, December 06, 2009

Toddlers and Tiraras and Pageants.....Oh Crap!





Yesterday was a very long, but very interesting day. Kylene entered Ally in this pageant, Toddlers and Tiaras, the TV show, was following 3 little girls in this pageant and unbeknownst to us, we were going to have our own adventure! This is the inside scoop.

Whenever I'd heard the term 'glitz' pageant, I just thought the kids wore extra-sparkly dresses and some makeup. Can you say naive? Kylene and I were in for more than a few surprises!

I had no clue that kids were so well trained for these pageants. As young as 2, these kids knew exactly where to stand on stage, where to walk, how to walk, who to look at and how to look. Ally is an adorable kid but she really looked lost on stage.

Because of the TV show, all the kids had to wear some makeup and have their hair done. The lady who did Ally's makeup and hair was very sweet and encouraging. Ally looked great in her makeup but her hair wasn't as pretty as her natural hair. Here's Ally just before the first time she went on stage:



Then things got interesting.....

Ally was supposed to have 3 outfits. We were going to change one of the outfits up and use it twice, but after seeing the outfits the other kids had, we knew we'd need to go get another outfit during the lunch break. The other kids' outfits were mesmerizing. These kids (or rather their moms) were professionals at this pageant stuff. It felt like someone dressed in jeans and a t-shirt trying to compete with someone decked out in a Las Vegas showgirl outfit.

So, time to go to lunch. Kylene couldn't find her keys and it took about 45 minutes to discover that some guy had picked them up and was just holding them in the audience....argh...

Kylene found an adorable dress (that will double for a terrific Christmas dress!) and it was 50% off. When Ally tried the dress on, her poor hair was looking pretty bad. So Kylene just wet it down and it looked great. (no more messing with that kid's wonderfully naturally curly hair). We added a rhinestone necklace and her big 'diamond' ring and here's how Ally looked before singing, "Diamonds are a girls' best friend":



Ally was having a grand time and was totally oblivious to what her mom was dealing with.... Kylene misplaced her phone. Before we had to retrace our route, she finally found the phone one the ground by the car. And then she discovered that she had left her camcorder and camera in her sister-in-law's car and her stuff was now in Nacogdoches. That was going to add an hour to her travel time home.

In the midst of that, Benjamin had a diaper blowout. A big one. The pageant was held in an elementary school and they didn't have any place to change a baby's diaper. Imagine that! *grin* Poor Benjamin got his britches changed and got all cleaned up in the back of the van.

I give Kylene much credit. Not once did she snap at Ally or get frustrated with her or impatient. It was pretty amazing. And Ally was having a great time. After her singing, it was time to wait a couple more hours for all the crowning. Not only did Ally play well with the toys Kylene thoughtfully brought, she also made friends with other kids nearby. More than once, she'd ask little girls, 'do you want to play with me?'. I think there were a number of moms who were thankful Ally was there too!

Ally usually takes a 2-3 hour nap every day. She was so tired by the end of the pageant. I'm guessing, when you see drama on Toddlers and Tiaras, it's probably at the end of the day, when kids are tired and cranky. Ally really wanted a crown and they were all sitting up on a table on the stage for all to see all day long. Because these others kids were such professionals at pageants, Kylene began to prepare Ally for the fact that not everyone wins a crown.

Actually, at that point, Kylene really wanted to go home. And I don't blame her. It was one of those days that will be laughed about in the future. In the present, it was like spending a slow motion day in hell.

Then they started the crowning... All these spray tanned kiddos went up to get their crowns and Kylene kept telling Ally that not everyone gets a crown. Just as Kylene was getting up to go change Ally into her jeans, Ally's name is called for Overall Most Beautiful! She got a crown!! I think both Kylene AND Ally were shocked!



Everyone loaded up, happy and exhausted, and headed home, by way of Nacogdoches to pick up the camera first. Kylene had one more adventure when she drove into a ditch and had to have a tow truck help her out.

It was definitely Ally's day. She had fun and got a crown. Next time she wants a crown, it may be cheaper to buy one!

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Longview, Texas
In the autumn of my life, I am very content.

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